"I see . . ." Kyla trailed off.

That was . . . sad. Really, really sad. The poor girl was worse than being dead. She was trapped with nowhere to go, where her feelings couldn't escape, and she was all alone. Like being locked in a box for your entire life. That was just horrible. Kyla frowned and looked out into the hall, where she could see the scythe leaning up against the corner in the kitchen. If she could somehow communicate with that girl, she'd have told her "I'm sorry."

Kyla looked back to Eld and nodded. "Yes. It's . . . I think it's been called empathy? I don't really know for sure. But . . . love's a strong emotion, and so is all the pain that comes from it, and I know when someone's experiencing all of that. Hugh and I have both been able to do that since as far back as we can remember."

She leaned to the left a bit again, once more looking into the kitchen.

"The girl that's trapped in there . . ." Kyla began, opting to give an example, "her heart's split in two. I think . . . I think she's in love with two people, and she must know she can't be with them, or even that it's unrequited, because she's sad and desperate for love or affection from either of them. It's . . . it's horrible. I wish there was some way to free her. So someone can hold her when she's crying at night. She's hurting worse than anyone I've ever met . . ."

Eld remained silent for a long time, a sad expression on his face. Kyla believed that Kageko was in love with two people...that could only be him and the man from her dream, whom he suspected was Attis. The limited contact she had others eliminated pretty much any other possibility.

He'd always felt terrible about their arrangement, and now even more so. She was always eager to help him, but he didn't want a servant. He didn't want her to be trapped and forced to obey him.

"...If there's a way to free her, I'll find it," he declared. He'd never thought much about it before, as it always seemed impossible, but with all the strange things in the world that he was encountering recently he now found it difficult to believe there was absolutely no way. "Then she doesn't have to be anyone's tool, not even mine."

Kyla continued to stare into the kitchen, at the scythe standing in the corner. Eld was willing to actually do that. Go through any trouble necessary to help that girl. Free her so she might be happy again. He wasn't a bad person. Kyla could now tell as much. He had the interests of others in his heart. Ignorance was his folly, and it was that very issue which condemned so many to death.

"If you did. If you freed her," Kyla paused, and without taking her eyes away from the scythe, asked bluntly: "Would you love her?"

When Kyla looked back at Eld at last, he'd probably be able to see from the look upon Kyla's face that she knew the answer. And by the way she frowned and looked solemnly into his eyes, that it was unlikely the answer was in Kageko's favor. That there was still more pain for that girl to go through, even if she were released from that weapon of war. It wasn't long after that Kyla gasped and pressed her hands over the middle of her chest. Suddenly, she felt horrible.

"I-- I'm sorry! That's--" she paused again and shook her head quickly, "That's . . . that's much too personal. I'm sorry. You don't have to answer that."

Eld averted his gaze from her. Kyla brought up a good point, one he'd been too busy to think about lately. "I already love another," he stated, ignoring her retraction of the question. "But...if she's free, she can find love elsewhere. At least, that's what I hope." His actions were perhaps far from honorable in light of that, but was the other option? To deny her feelings and condemn her to a trapped existence without any kind of warmth? That would be far more cruel, he felt.

It would probably not take not take any special powers for her to tell that Kageko was not the only one who's heart went out to more than one person. Or that he was not a stranger to heartache, both experiencing it and causing it.

"S-Sorry...my life has been pretty strange lately. I don't get much of a chance to think about these things, let alone talk about them."

Kyla nodded her head. At least Eld was honest--and still willing to try and free the girl, regardless of how unrequited her feelings were. Indeed, Eld's heart was split in two, as well, but it wasn't like the girl's. It wasn't a fifty-fifty even split. With Eld, though, it wasn't. There was only so much of his heart he could give to that second girl, the trapped girl, because someone else had already won his heart.

"She feels strongly enough for you that . . ." Kyla started and stopped, realizing that she might be prying too much again, but continued anyways: "she might still try to pursue you, despite that. The two of you are the only things in the world for her. You can't expect her to let that go easily."

It wasn't so much that she was admonishing Eld for his decisions as it was she was trying to tell him a bit about how the heart worked. About how hard it was to let go of a person, especially when they were that important to you. And she could only hope he understood from that how cruel it would be to her to shrug her off casually.

"...I know. I don't intend to abandon her or anything. But...I can't help but think the only reason she feels so strongly for me is that I'm all she has right now. I want her to experience more of the world. If she still decides that I'm what's most important to her...well, I'll have to deal with it then."

Right now, he was her only support, the only thing she could see that existed out of her dark world. He wanted her to be able to make friends, find hobbies, likes and dislikes. He hoped that if she made other attachments she wouldn't feel as reliant on him.

"That's kind of you," Kyla said genuinely.

This conversation had certainly been . . . interesting, to say the least. Enlightening, in fact. She didn't think the Reaper would actually be that considerate of other people. Perhaps not here to kill her, but not necessarily considerate of her and others, either.

"This is all . . . this is all so messed up," Kyla admitted under her breath, "It's all so wrong. I-- I was expecting you to be evil. I was expecting you to be a horrible monster. I-- I mean-- you've killed so many of us. Some of them were even my friends."

Why did he do it, then? Why did he murder nearly every Memory that stepped foot into Hillcrest? Was it really all for her? And then . . . why did people want her so badly to willingly throw their lives away? Was it because they were ordered to, or was there something deeper to it?

"I don't understand how someone so outwardly compassionate could do something so horrible." When Kyla looked up at him again, it appeared as if she had tears in her eyes.

While Eld could definitely sympathize with the feeling that the situation was very, very confusing and messy, it quickly became apparent to him that Kyla was grossly mistaken about something. "W-Wait a second, what? I haven't killed anyone!"

"I mean...I won't lie. If he refuses to return Etsu back to normal, I might kill Illorex." He'd been angry and ready when he'd started out; determined to do whatever it took, and he honestly wouldn't have been too sad if Illorex died by his hands. He'd done nothing but threaten him and the people of Hillcrest.

But now the thought saddened him. It didn't lessen his resolve any, but he would truly rather not have things come to a violent end. If Hugh could talk Illorex into restoring Etsu, then he'd make good on his word and simply leave. "But...it's not something I want to do. I just want to save Etsu; she's the girl I was with the first time we met. She's...very important to me."

While at first, Kyla was going to address the issue of Eld's memory and those he'd killed in the past, she switched gears rather quickly when Eld said he was willing to kill Illorex.

"But Illorex isn't a bad person!" Kyla exclaimed in a brief show of frustration.

Followed in short by her stiffening up and biting her lower lip, averting her gaze from Eld and fixing it upon the floor. Maybe she had good reason to lose her cool (which was in itself not that explosive; Kyla was a very mild mannered person, after all), but that didn't mean she had to. Still, she didn't apologize. For anything, really. Anything outside of nearly breaking Eld's noggin. She didn't feel she had to.

"The Terras didn't understand that, either. I don't even think Emil understands that." Kyla sighed. "It's just Hugh, Milos, and me that know he's a good person, still."

He wanted to argue with her; a good person wouldn't steal the identities of innocent people just to coerce information out of them. A good person wouldn't have taken Etsu's; he could have just left, or he could have put it back after knocking her out. But if Illorex was her friend, then it wasn't as though he was going to convince her.

"...If he's a good person, then Hugh will convince him to save Etsu, and I won't need to hurt him. Holding onto gains him nothing but my ire."

"Besides...even good people do bad things, sometimes for good reasons." He'd...had a lot of experience with that. Far more than he would've liked, for more than anyone should have to.

". . . Hugh doesn't have to convince him," Kyla replied with a forlorn look and a solemn tone, "That's the worst part about it. He doesn't even have to talk him into it."

"Your heart is split in two. And you know how bad that alone hurts." Kyla looked up to Eld again, her eyes still moist, though she wore a look of determination. She was determined to make him understand. See eye to eye with her. Know that Illorex was not the monster he thought he was. "Illorex's is split into thousands. His heart's so fractured, he can't so much as make the smallest decision. He's helpless and alone, and all the thousands of fractures are so painful for him, he just turns it all off. Illorex chooses to be a mindless soldier of Memoria, because it's numb and anything else would just break him down as a person."

Kyla paused to take a deep breath. "So he takes orders from everyone here. It doesn't even matter who. He'll do what Hugh tells him to do, because Hugh is from this city. And then Illorex does horrible things at the orders of other people, and he's vilified for it. And no one understands that it's not even him. The Illorex everyone sees is just a shell, containing all the fragments of his heart and everything that used to be him."

Eld remained silent. Truthfully, he didn't want to understand, to sympathize. That would only make it harder if he ended up having to fight him, and while Kyla seemed convinced Hugh would certainly get him to restore Etsu, he couldn't let himself belive that until it happened. He didn't want to get his hopes up.

"...It does sound horrible. And I don't want to have to kill for Etsu's sake. I just...I won't be able to live myself if she dies and I didn't prevent it." He wondered if Kyla would go to the same lengths for Hugh, but he had a feeling even asking her would be cruel. He was certain of how Hugh felt--if something threatened Kyla, Hugh would march into hell itself to save her.

It was a few more moments before something occurred to him. "Illorex just does what he's ordered to, then? Does that mean...did someone order him to take Etsu's identity?"

"And what if she didn't want you to kill for her sake?" Kyla asked, but quickly opted to drop the subject. She shook her head instead, indicating that Eld didn't have to answer that question. Kyla made her point to the best of her ability. If she pressed on like this . . .

Kyla lifted a hand to her lips and coughed. It was sudden and harsh, followed by several other coughs, each one sounding worse than the previous one. It was a coughing fit that could only be seen as coming about from excess, from working oneself up. It had the same symptoms. She was just fine until she got riled up (good natured though her arguments were). That, however, was only ever seen in patients with weakened bodies. Kyla was able to relax a bit more once the coughing fit died down, after which she paused a moment to shut her eyes and breath through her nose. She was light headed. Felt like she was about to faint.

"P-- pro-- probably . . . you," she whispered, her voice a bit strained, "I-- I mean, Illorex was probably sent for you, a-and accidentally got her instead, a-and didn't know what to do. I-if he doesn't know what to do, he usually just goes back home."

Eld decided not to say the truth, which was that as far as Reapers were concerned all Memories were Voleur d'Ame and that, while she might sympathize or even feel bad about it she would do her duty. Even the time she'd technically disobeyed orders she hadn't been able to bring herself to abandon her duty entirely.

In truth, he was kind of jealous of her; things were almost always clear-cut with Etsu, while he found himself hesitating much of the time. He wished he could be as certain as she often was.

Regardless, he hoped she was right about Illorex; it would make his life much simpler if he merely took Etsu's identity because she'd tried to defend him and was willing to hand restore her.

At Kyla's coughing, Eld sat up, though this time slowly enough to avoid aggravating his injuries further. "Whoa, hey, don't push yourself." He'd heard coughs like that before, and it usually didn't indicate anything good. It reminded him of when Emma was younger and used to get sick pretty frequently.

Kyla nodded her head a little. After that, she practically seemed like she was a bit out of it. No longer energetic or able to relay optimistic, if not idealistic arguments.

"I-- I know," Kyla replied, still a bit breathless, "I-- I'm okay."

Now that Eld was a little more capable of sitting up without being in too much, as well as finally being able to focus, look around, and catch some of the finer details around him, he'd be able to see just how pale and thin Kyla looked. In the low light of the room, it was hard to tell without looking at her for awhile, but she didn't look healthy at all.

"H-Hugh should be back soon," she whispered as she turned a bit to look at the front door. "I-- I can feel him. He'll back back very soon."

She could only hope he had good news.