Trydian was drained of energy and overwhelmed with new emotions. Sebilla's body felt warm against him, or maybe that was his imagination playing tricks. She looked content, maybe even enthralled. He smoothed her hair and ran his fingers through it slowly. If he had this to come back to, he'd make sure that he definitely came back alive.
“I hope I gain my energy back, so I don't have to explain this exhaustion to King Pendaran.” Trydian said, noting that the tension between them had lifted. Speaking to her felt more at ease. He no longer felt as though he were stepping on egg shells.
Trydian thought out-loud for a moment, knowing that her heart raced for other reasons aside from lust.”I want you to promise me that you'll live. Even if you witness my death.” He looked at her, with a serious expression for the first time in weeks. “Go with Igraine if you can. If they make it through this, I want you to leave this place. If I am still alive, I will probably stay here.” Trydian said, realizing that he hadn't exactly been planning that circumstance. He didn't relish the idea of her continuing to dwell in the place that had changed her.
“If you have to fight me, use your power to destroy my sword. It will be less traumatizing.” Trydian explained, almost trying to convince himself of his own words. “Tell that to father too. I'm sure he'll enjoy killing me.” He was confident that Sebilla would share the information, even though she had explained that she was under strict contract.
With how long they had indulged in each other, he hoped that she wasn't pregnant. It would be even more cruel to bring their child into this world- especially if he couldn't be there. “With how long we went, let's hope you aren't pregnant. I don't want to be a father, any more than you want to give birth to a demon. Just because you are stronger, doesn't mean it won't be just as painful. It just means you will live through it.” Trydian blushed, realizing how much he had actually been thinking about impregnating her. It wasn't that he wanted to, but more of a precaution and “what-if” scenario.
“As for emotions...I have plenty of them. I just express my frustration and needs in a different way.” Trydian said, making the remark aimed at their sexual exploit. He had cried in the past, but not for reasons that she was probably assuming.
“Should I die, you can honor my death, by moving on and having children with someone else. I don't want to be responsible for your unhappiness.” Trydian knew she could be strong enough, but he also feared that she would hold onto his memory.
“You deserve a future with someone who can take care of you better.” Trydian said, knowing he could always please her physically, but he doubted he could take the actual responsibility of being with her.
“Just promise me that you'll live past all of this and I can go into battle with a clear conscience.”